Grow New

July 7th, 2013

When loss or tragedy smashes into our world, we have two choices – we can either grow old, or grow new. Growing old gives into the tragedy. It lets loss of another steal whatever life we have left. It invites serious depression, often requiring help to overcome it. It makes you way old way, way before your time, because it takes a physical toll, too.

Growing new is scary. It means different things for different people and different situations. One thing it means for all of us, though, is that it means moving forward. Growing new isn’t easy. You make the choice, but it’s a journey. People tell you it gets easier and one day you’ll be okay. That’s all fine, well, and good, but what about the days until that time comes? How do you make it until it’s “easier” or you are “okay”? Here are some tips for growing new:

1.The first few weeks start each day by asking God for strength for simply getting thru the day.

2. Talk and talk and talk to people about it until you have no voice left. When i went through my growing new period, I was on anyone who’d listen like white on rice. They don’t have to answer you or give you advice. Find people who will just let you talk. By talking, you figure it out for yourself. Many people did that for me and it was the main factor in my healing.

3. Finally, the words to a song I still sing in my mind in yoga when I stare at the ceiling in savasana were a big help, daily:

“I lift my eyes to the maker of the mountains I can’t climb.
I lift my eyes to calmer of the oceans raging wild.
I lift my eyes to healer of the pain I hold inside…I lift my eyes..I lift my eyes, to You.”

When I had no words to pray and hurt so bad I thought my chest would burst – that song taught me to simply “lift my eyes”. I’d just look up and picture clouds and God and my mom and I’d immediately feel some peace.

So choose today, not to grow old, just to grow new. It’s a process. It’s a journey leading to that day people tell you will one day come. It changes you inside.

And so, as another day goes by, I will always lift my eyes and grow new, and…I have written.