U is for Unfocused

It’s Fun Friday and time for the A-Z Blog Hop. Do you believe we are at the letter U already? For me, today, U is for “unfocused.

I have worked for Koko Fit Club for over three months now and have trained a lot of people. Within a month of their training a lot of them achieve their first perfect workout, getting 1000/1000 and a pace score of 100%. Over and over I find myself singing their praises while I tell them I’ve worked out there for over one year and still have not achieved my first perfect workout.

It was these conversations that I was thinking about as I started my workout Wednesday morning. I was doing the first few exercises and contemplating why I still haven’t achieved what seems so easy for everyone else, even newbies. I was lifting my ankle up and down, thinking this, watching the pace bar going up and down when ‘click’ went the door. I found myself beginning to hurry the pace bar (which you can’t do) just so I could turn to see who just came into the club. There it dawned on me. During my workout I am unfocused. Everything distracts me. I love doing six things at once (the trait of a kindergarten teacher) so watching the pace bar while monitoring the door and/or even talking to people, kept me from focusing on that perfect workout. I just didn’t care enough to reign myself in and concentrate. My workouts are always nine hundred something out of a thousand. My pacing is never below 95%. That’s good enough, right? Right. Until the next time I find myself telling a new client I STILL have not achieved that perfect workout.

Through Bikram yoga I have gotten quite good at releasing myself from perfection. I lived by “it’s yoga practice, not yoga perfect”. And this was not a bad thing because my perfection addiction was well on its way to OCD and needed to be tamed. I have learned that just being there (yoga or fit club) was enough. I wasn’t home, in the chair. My motto for the last three years has been to “stay outta the chair”. Mission accomplished – but at what price? Do I now use it’s “exercise progress, not exercise perfection” as an excuse to not do something I know I’m capable of doing? Am I capable of doing it?

Wednesday I decided to try. I made up my mind to concentrate only on that pace bar and make note of anything that tried to distract me. 30% of the way done – still a perfect score – the beautiful picture on the big screen TV wanted my attention. 50% of the way through – the reflection of the swirling snowflakes outside onto the TV screen, wanted my attention. 65% of the way through – still a perfect score- the door opened and I oh so wanted to turn around and see who came in. 75% of the way through – STILL a perfect score – a friend walked by and I so wanted to engage in conversation. 90% of the way through – STILL a perfect score – I began thinking I was gonna do this today! 99.9% of the way through I saw myself wearing the Perfect Workout T Shirt you get, when – BLINK – the green line flashed yellow as it slipped out of the blue box. Really? I was on 7 out of my LAST set of 10. Three more pulls of the rope and I had my perfect workout and I blew it. I could not contain my excitement over getting the T Shirt long enough to actually get it. I was distracted from getting a perfect workout by the possibility of getting a perfect workout.

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And so, as another day goes by, clearly U stands for Unfocused, I think I see a New Year’s Resolution in the making, and…I have written.

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