Working through the resistance was definitely the story of tonight’s Bikram yoga class. Once again it was my beloved teacher, Alex, who always utters just the right words at just the right time. There is always a very good chance of some resistance clogging up my practice. Tonight it was the heat, but if wasn’t the heat, it’d be the humidity. And if it wasn’t the humidity, it’d be my muscles from fit club acting up. And if it wasn’t my muscles, it be the lack of electrolytes. And if it wasn’t the lack of electrolytes, it’d be hydration. Being fully prepared for class is more exhausting than the actual class. But…if by chance…you do get all of these things to work perfectly, the class is amazing.
For the last few weeks it’s been muscles from fit club growing and strengthening and starting wars with my yoga practice. Being in NY for five days, I haven’t been in yoga for seven days. This morning I knew I was going to the 4:30 pm class so I spent all day preparing for this. My fit club muscles were rested and not sore. I drank three bottles of water, one with Herbalife H3O in it. I ate a light lunch. Snack was a coconut water fruit bar. I was well-rested, etc. I had all the bases covered. I was going to rock this class despite not being there for seven days. Not.
Every single thing was fine. My muscles felt good. I was hydrated. The humidity was fine. I was breathing easily. But the heat was unbearable. I was very comfortable except for the fact that my entire skin was burning like I was out in the sun. Instead of our usual 97-105 degrees, that room had to be 110, plus. Alex was semi-generous with the door and windows, but not enough until the end of class. By then it was too late. I sat out the second set of at least four poses. During the floor series I sincerely thought my mat was a heating pad. You get the idea. It was a rough class and no matter how prepared I was, the heat managed to get the best of me. I was so disappointed. I just wanted out of there. I just wanted air on my skin. And then he says it. Right before the last pose.
There will always be resistance. In here we learn to work through the resistance.
As we move through the last pose, I feel my disappointment wash away with the sweat. There is a reason to be here after all and it wasn’t to be a rockstar. It was to put the ego aside and face what is. It was a reincarnation of that damned serenity prayer. Accept the things you cannot change. Learn to work through the resistance.
Earlier tonight I was sifting through the blogs I follow. Good ole Jennifer Boykin at Life After Tampons reinforces the message:
Learn to Enjoy Your Own Company
Sometimes we keep busy because we don’t want to be alone with ourselves. Perhaps we are afraid of what will bubble up in our own emotions when we stop anesthetizing ourselves with frenetic energy. If that happens for you, to the extent that you are able, try and sit still with the fear. Allow your beautiful heart to open itself. Allow the fear or regret or sorrow or whatever to come. Picture your intense feelings like waves at the ocean. Allow them to wash over you and move on.
The she drops it, like Alex did:
Remember, what you resist persists.
Okay, was she in class with me? (Jennifer is a smart lady and if you don’t already subscribe to Life After Tampons, you should.)
I let the heat wash over me. I felt my disappointment. Then when Alex said you have to work through the resistance and I knew why I was there tonight, the disappointment fell away.
And so, as another day goes by, do not get frustrated with the resistance built into our days, practice working through it, and…I have written.
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